Love your parents

Love your parents

As-Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullah wa Barakatuh

Today I saw this video which I posted above and started to think about my relationship with my parents, Alhamdulillah it could be worse, but of course it could be a lot better too.

As Muslims we should love our parents because Allah and his Messenger sallallahu aleyhi wa sallam commanded us to do so.

“We have enjoined on man kindness to his parents; but if they strive (to force) thee to join with Me anything of which thou hast no knowledge, obey them not.”[1]

“…The pleasure of the Lord is in the pleasure of a parent, and the wrath of the Lord is in the wrath of a parent”[2]

“…’O Messenger of Allah. To whom should I be good? He replied, Your mother. So I asked, Then who? He replied, Your mother. I asked, Then who? He replied, Your father, then the next closest relative, and then the next.”[3]

“… The major sins, which are nine in number are as follows … causing one’s parents to shed tears because of one’s disobedience. Then Ibn ‘Umar said to me. ‘Do you fear the Fire and desire to go to Paradise?’ I replied, ‘Yes, by Allah!’ He said, ‘Are your parents still alive?* I replied ‘Only my mother.’ He replied, ‘By Allah, if you speak with her gently and give her food to eat, you will surely enter Paradise if you avoid these major sins.’” [4]

Now looking at the Ayah from the Qur’an and these Hadiths we see the importance of parents to us as Muslims, we should love and cherish them even if they are unjust towards you.

“…Even if they are unjust(one must act to please one’s parents)”[5]

So even if your parents are unjust towards you and are not doing to you what they should according to Islam, you must still treat them kindly and respect them.

You must obey their command as long as it is not against the command of Allah, then it would become sinful for you to obey your parents. If your parents tell you to not wear the Hijab or to not pray Salat, you are to disobey them, but if they were to ask you to go to the supermarket to buy bread you are not even allowed to say “uff” to them, you are to obey them.

“Your Lord has enjoined the following: You should not worship anyone but Him Alone! Treat your parents with great kindness; if either or both of them attain old age, do not even say ‘uff’ to them; nor rebuke them; but speak to them kind words. Treat them with humility and tenderness and pray, “O our Lord, be merciful to them, just as they brought me up with kindness and affection in my childhood.”[6]

A convert might use the excuse “My parents are not Muslim, so I don’t need to obey them, they are not on the Straight Path”, but the reality is the complete opposite. It does not matter if your parent is a Muslim, Ahl Kitab or a Mushrikeen, you are to do good to them and please them, in this is a great reward.

It is very unfortunate that our Ummah is in the state that it is today. Parents know each and single Ayat in the Qur’an that speaks about the rights of the parents but neglect the rights of their children, children rebel against their parents, this is a reality. The only way we can cure this problem is with correct manners and with love, if you are a parent, treat your child with love as Allah and his Messenger sallallahu aleyhi wa sallam ordered you to do, and if you have parents, then treat them with kindness and be gentle to them whatever they may do to you, of course this is easier said than done, but in following the rules of Allah there is a great reward and in breaking them there is a severe punishment.

“Surely we belong to Allah and to Him shall we return”[7]

-Fady

[1]Qur’an 29:8

[2] Al-Adab al-Mufrad al-Bukhari Hadith 2

[3] Al-Adab al-Mufrad al-Bukhari Hadith 3

[4] Al-Adab al-Mufrad al-Bukhari Hadith 8

[5] Al-Adab al-Mufrad al-Bukhari Hadith 7

[6] Qur’an 17:23-24

[7] Qur’an 2:156

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